Dear Extroverts,
As an Introvert, with close friends, family members and even a boif who are Extroverts, there are some things I feel you should know about us.
1. We need time to refuel.
The nature of an Introvert is one who gets their energy from their alone time, and that baby is vital for us to function in everyday life. Don't get us wrong, we love spending time with you guys, but we just can't function on socialising alone. For example, last summer I spent 2 weeks in London with le boif. During the lead up the the holiday, I was super excited. 2 weeks of boif-time? Bring it on. However, I did have to warn my charming Extrovert of a boif beforehand that as excited as I was about spending time with him, I was going to need some alone time. A weekend without refuelling, we can do, but 2 whole weeks... could you go without sleep, food or water for 2 weeks? Umm... no way José. Anyway, I loved my holiday, but le boif had to understand that I needed space sometimes, and I read 2 whole books during those 2 weeks to keep me sane. Conclusion: we love you, but don't be offended or hurt when we tell you to give us time to ourselves.
2. We think, a lot. Seriously.
We're perpetual ponderers. If we go quiet, we're not upset, we are thinking. We don't feel the need to talk constantly, or fill all of those 'awkward' silences. In fact, we often don't notice them at all. So next time you see one of us staring into space, or closing our eyes for a moment, take a breather, we're fine, I promise!
3. We like to party, just not with strangers...
I love dancing, and I love parties, but I cannot even consider attending a party without asking the famous question: "who else is going?" It's not that you, Mr/Ms Extrovert aren't entertaining enough for us, we just know that you like to mix, and socialise, and we don't share the same passion for strangers. We have our friends, and we love them dearly, and we aren't constantly on the lookout for potential new ones. We're happy with our lot, and we don't particularly enjoy the whole meeting new people thing.
4. We feel super bad about holding you back.
When we actually do go to that party with you, we want you all to ourselves, and we feel über guilty for stopping you from doing your thing and making new friends. But we only came here to be with you, and our other besties. We're sorry!
5. We like to listen.
Y'know that thing you were going to tell us but stopped because you thought you'd bore us, or that we wouldn't understand? Please tell us. We're avid listeners, and we care. Not to mention, one of the perks of being an Intro, is that our empathy skills are pretty brag-tastic. We don't have many close friends, but the ones we do have we take care of, and we have time for. So feel free to lighten your load and share.
6. We can get pretty intense.
We have so many feels. Honestly, we have feels all over the place. We Introverts are sensitive, and I, personally, can hardly go through a week without crying at least once over a piece of music, a book, a thought, that thing you texted us, anything. We remember most of the things you tell us, and can be easily hurt. We also love having deep, intimate conversations with you, and always want to get closer to you. But we're always that little bit scared of scaring our friends away with our feelings for you guys, or not being light-hearted enough for your taste, so we try not to let ourselves open up too much.
7. We're secretly affectionate.
Most introverts are shy, and often guarded. But often what we can't say, we'll find some way to show it. We love you guys, you are our closest friends, and super dear to us, but instead of sounding over the top, like we feel, we'll share this by being physically close to you, smiling at you, reading that book you recommended or remembering to wish you luck the day of your exam. We don't want to frighten you guys away, but we just wanna give you all giant bear hugs.
8. We love one on one.
As much as we love hanging out with all our friends, in one bundle, we kinda like some alone time with you all. There are certain things we wouldn't share with everyone at the same time, or with all of our friends in general, and also, we like it when you open up to us, which usually happens in one on one time. We especially hate society's view on male-female friendships, and how one on one is nearly synonymous with a date, and we disagree with it strongly. We like our mates, and we want you all to ourselves every now and again.
9. We need to be handled with care.
Please don't push us into socialising because it's 'good for us'. Yes, we do appreciate your help in reaching out to someone new, and we are glad that you can bridge that gap for us. But at the same time, we don't need to socialise as much as you do, and we don't want that. Don't make us feel bad if we turn down that invite, or don't go overboard trying to befriend that person you introduced us to.
10. We happy being who we are.
While we do envy you Extroverts from time to time in your ease of making friends, your way of breezing through social situations and your confidence in the matter, we actually don't want to be you. We're happy being the ever illusive Introverts, for the most part. We don't need pity, or help to become more like you. We enjoy your bubbly, outgoing nature, and we wouldn't change it for the world, but we love that we are what we are.
So Extroverts, you've heard it, straight from the horse's mouth. I can only speak from personal experience of course, and we Introverts are by no means identical, but this has been my interaction with Extroverts over the years, and these are the things I feel you should know about us, in order to fully understand and accept us.
Love,
A Silly Little Introvert.
P.S: Disagree with me? Have anything to add? Feel free to leave me a comment.
